INSECURE

2011-10-06T20:40:00.000+08:00

I am feeling so messed up right now
I feel guilty for scolding bf just now.
Its not even his fault in the first place.
I breaking down and i feel so useless right now.
I hate the fact that i have to change class every semester.
I hate the fact that karma strikes me hard.
But all of that is useless cause i cant change everything.

The thought of having classmates with a friend friend would be good.
But think again.
It gets tougher.
Its hard trying to make friends.
Shikin is right.
Maybe i should just stop expecting and stick with the friends that i have already.

Its only the second day of Year 2 Semester 2 but i already dreading it.
Wonder how it would get later on.

2011-09-30T01:56:00.000+08:00

NOMAD ADVENTURE TRIP TO IPOH!!

HELL YEAH!!

I made a lot of friends there. The one that i know but never talk to or the one that i never thought i would be friends with.

Its been so long since i update this old blog of mine.

My night had been filled by ooVoo-ing with the lovelies.

There's more picture but im too lazy to upload it here.

Basically because i don't think there's anyone who read my blog and also i am too lazy to edit this blog.

I really need to do something about this blog.

Its getting so old and im tired of it.

Shall change to a different blog.

Wordpress maybe.

Lets just see how.

I'll end it here.

Toodles

2011-06-27T21:06:00.002+08:00

1 year and 2 month single

2011-05-15T16:41:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling lost right now.
I hate staying at home with nothing to do.
Cause thats when i will start thinking about a lot of things
About my life
About my future
Am i doing the right thing
Its wrong wanting more than one right

But its not my intention
The way the relationship made me like this.
Being neglected made me do this
But at the end of the day,i am still single.
So does it make me a cheater.
No right
I am nobody's property.

I can't choose the second want
Even though ppl say we have to choose the second one
Cause we will not cheat on the first if we love the guy deeply.
But i dont think that way.
Cause we wouldn't be guilty if don't love the first one
Its clear that the second is just for entertainment
But when things seem serious now.
I have to let go.

I shouldn't be leading him longer.
Stop thinking about the thing that you're going to lose.
But think about the family too
Yes,i have been going out without my parents knowing.
Riding,going out from Singapore.
LIES.
REPENT ATIKAH.

2011-05-12T14:27:00.000+08:00

Random mood to blog

I'm finally 19th now.
So my birthday was spent at work in the morning and waiting for people in the afternoon.
Was working morning shift on that day.
Done with work by 4.30pm.
Waited for J till 7pm and decided to just go back.
I was furious at that point of time.
Got back and bath and wait for him again.
Reach around 9pm.
Go to the car and head to my manager house.
They are there to take the fish tank.
Reach home around midnight

Ouh ya.
About present.

My kakak at work bought me a bedroom slipper at robinson

But its red in colour

My girlfriends bought me a new look wallet

(no pictures yet)

My lovely and sayang darling serene bought cupcake for me

Nice right..

My princess dutdut bought for me body shop white musk shower pack

But the most surprising gift and "AWESOMESSSSS" PRESENT WOULD BE

MY IPOD TOUCH 4

YES!!I finally got my ipod touch from mama,papa and also kakak.

Thank you to them i got something to use to watch movie in the train.

No celebration for me though
Just the normal bringing of cake to me.

School wise is good i think
Getting along with most of them
but there is up and down as usual.
But they are a fun bunch of people.

Ending here.
Bye

2011-04-01T21:52:00.000+08:00

So my last update was 14/2
Today marks the start the first day of April.

Up till now,a lot of things had happened
Good and bad things.
It will never stop.

Cries and laughter filled my days.

My life is still like a roller coaster ride.
With school,work,friends and also family.
I can never run from it.
School was okay i guess.
I passed my GPA.
Even though it went down 0.05.
But i am still thankful to it.

Work life have been tough.
A lot of hardship i went through there.
But don't forget the happiness too.
Dramas everywhere.
Its hard to be neutral actually.
Colleagues wise,i think there's ups and down.
But i will hang on to it.
Nothing gonna bring me down now.

Friends.
There three categories
School friends are awesome.
They filled up my days every now and then

Girlfriends,are getting better.
Not much drama like last time.

Work friends are great.
They are there for me when i need them.

Family are like waves.
Sometimes u are high tide
sometimes u are low tide.
No comment to it.

I have no clue why i am even updating when i know no one actually read my blog right?

Ouh ya
For relationship wise,i am happy being single.
Single but not interested in any relationship.
For now i guess.

Good night then

E37K

2011-02-14T23:54:00.001+08:00

Year 1 semester 2.
E37K.

At first i really thought that the class would not be as fun as my previous class.
But i was wrong.
The class was filled with great and matured people.
We are actually more to the PBG's people.
PBG stands for Perangai Budak Gemok.

We always look forward to breaks.
Not looking forward but sometimes force the faci to let us go off break early.
I will remember the time we went breaks together.
The time when we gossip together,
The time we fought for no reasons.
The time when we always do the import/export ppts.
The time when we took pictures of people sleeping.
The time when we hacked to people's facebook and twitter.
The time when were together.

I will miss all that.
Even though some of us would be in the same class,it is still different.
The surrounding would still be different.

I would like to post what i think about u guys.

First of all would be Zara piggy.

At first i really thought that you were the minah type.
But u are not eventually.
You're still young but ur mind set are very matured.
I can share every problem i have to you.
You will have a good advice to me.
I will miss u asking me to massage ur hand,
I will miss u asking me to talk softly.
I will miss u asking me to cook for u breakfast.
I will miss everything about u small girl.
A lot of things happen but i really hope that u still trust me and love me like u always have.

EYLA

Siti Nabila Huda Jasmi

Amy search daughter name.

I will miss calling u kak nala.

I will miss hearing u sing in class

I will miss u for making it rain when u sing.

I will miss being a PBG in class with u.

U're more matured than all of us.

But u never get angry by our lameness and childishness.

Finally i will miss u for being the STAR KARAT in the class.

My favorite brother in the class.

I was amazed on how fast we can bond in class.

The second week we starts calling each other XMM and XDD.

You were fun to be with.

You know me best.

You know when u should approach me when i'm mad.

I have no words to describe how great u are to me.

We just know each other for a few months.

But it feels like i know u my whole life.

I'm gonna miss u small brother.

Stephanie Megan Anthony

I thought that we could never bond.

But after a few weeks,we got close with each other.

We were making fun at each other.

I will miss playing cooking academy on ur itouch.

I will miss sharing secrets with u and faiz.

I will miss going study with u for UT3.

This week i got to see u the whole week.

From Monday to Sunday.

You always make my day.

I like the way u try to speak malay in the english slang.

I even keep the polaroid of u in my wallet.

I'm gonna miss u sweetheart.

Nurul Nabilah a.k.a LULU or Adorable Princess.

At first i thought that we could never be close.

You were very quite and not that socialize.

But i was wrong.

You were a great friend that i could share my secrets to.

I'm very envy with ur small body.

I will miss ur straight forward comments.

I think you know how i feel about u.

I'm gonna miss u so much.

I'm here for u if u need me NATI.

MIZAH a.k.a Yati

I will miss u philippines accent my maid.
You're such a caring friend
You will always ask me if i'm okay or not.
You always come very early in the morning.
I even requested a philippine sentence before i went home last friday.
I'm gonna miss u calling me queky in class.
I will miss u girlfriend <3

Serene

The girl who came always absent for the first and second week of school.

You were very quite.

My first impression of u: Free loader.

But nope.

You really helped out a lot.

I talked to u for help in new media.

I love to hug u.

I love to kiss u too(i'm not lesbian okay)

Shane

The tall korean guy.

The hotstuff of the class.

I'm gonna miss u dude.

I'm gonna miss u disturbing my babats.

Please stop sleeping in class.

I'm gonna miss how u presented in class.

You are so confident with urself.

Great friend that anyone could get. :D

Logan

My FOP friend and now my semester 2 classmate.

You are such a great friend

Noisy,irritating and everything lame.

I love to disturb u about ur race.

But u never got angry with me

U just scolded me when i use vulgarities in class

James

My taekwando and judo friend.

I like ur muscle.

How i wish i am as fit as u.

U love to sleep a lot in class.

I'm gonna miss playing train outside the class with rest.

If i need any massaged,i will call u

Esther a.k.a fatster.

My hot mama friend

Dragon boater.

I'm gonna miss ur dirty leg due to the dirty boat.

I'm gonna miss u fatster.

Hafiz

Hafiz my punching friend.

I still remember when you say that u like to joke around.

That sentence suit you the most.

Because we will always laugh to ur lame jokes.

I will miss punching u in class.

I will have to find someone to puch in my new class then.

Gonna miss u joker.

Faiz

My drama boy.

You are very mean sometimes.

You always say bad thing about me.

I still remember u crying while holding my leg.

It was weird but i think you can really acts.

i will miss singing magika song with u.

I will miss u saying "gemuk pe,maner dpt babat to me".

I will miss u buddy.

Jeremy.

You very childish sometimes.

And also "Act ah beng in class"

I will miss ur lame dance and jokes in class.

Fanny Kor Shi Ting.

I will miss calling u shi ting in class.

I will miss u asking me to ur hair early in the morning.

You are very lame and late for school.

Please come early in second year.

I will miss ur free hug shirt.

Tomboyish partner

Dennis.

The old boy in the class.

Yes,i will try to stop using vulgarities.

you're the guy who alwasy bring food to class.

I am surprise that u don't smoke cause u have a smoker face.

I will miss u for scolding me when i swear.

Mahirah.

Its on the right >

The girl who won't say no to food.

Please stop webcamming in class okay.

I will miss u geeky girl.

Yi long.

The guy who i dont favor at first.

You were very very friendly in class.

It was weird at first.

We have conflicts but i am glad that we solved it out.

I want to apologise if i ever hated u.

Friends. :D

Aishah.

My FOP friend too.

You are a very quiet person until its hard to get a solo picture of u.

It is hard for me to hear ur voice.

But i will miss u watching the same show as me in class.

Thank you for telling me where to buy the sweetest apple in school.

Best of luck to you :D

Last but not least

Shaun

You the guy who will always come in class with a can of drinks.

You live in yishun but u were always late.

Start coming early can.

I would always don't know if u were in class or not.

Sorry for calling u shane and not shaun in class sometimes.

Gonna miss u friend

I hope that i didn't missed out anyone.

The permanent classmate i mean.

I am thankful to have known u guys.

My sem2 wouldn't great one without u guys.

I will miss every single one of u.

Till we meet again.

Love u guys from the bottom of my heart.

<3<3<3

Love,

ATiquek.

2011-02-12T16:24:00.003+08:00

2011-02-12T00:22:00.000+08:00

Its been long that i updated this blog.
A lot of shit happen.
I thought 2010 was bad.
But i think 2011 suck as bad as 2010
When will i repent?

I really need to start praying again to keep my heart at peace.
My thoughts are messed up.
Its good that holidays coming.
I can have a good rest and work at the same time.

1st year 2nd semester just ended.
I miss my class already.
The things we did in class
It suck having to change class every 6 months.

I 'm tired of making new classmate over and over again
The introduction.
Dont talk about it.
I'm sure i'm gonna say
"hey i'm atikah but u can call me atiquek".
"i love to talk so just bear with it".

Love life.
I don't want to talk about it.
Can i just say that my current situation suck
I'm crying myself to sleep,

I skipped work today and skipping it tomorrow
I need to study and set my priority first.
I don't give a damm if they want to fire me.
My school is what i'm scared about now.

I'm done with cognitive notes.
Left with studying maths and new media
Going to school with lulu tomorrow to study.
Hope that studying tomorrow would be a success like how today was.
Having awkward moment could really make me study.

I got a lot to blog about but i'm lazy to share
I prefer keeping it all in and hurting myself.
Emotional swings now.

2011-01-26T16:11:00.003+08:00

I don't know.

But i feel like my life is so fucked up.

PMS

Some of the people in class are so annoying.

The facilitator,don't talk about it.

That is why i hate relied faci because their first impression sucks.

I'm tired to go work.

No inspiration.

Can say that i'm bored with work and the people there.

I'm going to quit soon and find a new job.

But maybe not now.

Second year of school.

The transportation fee are a killer.

I need to find work near by.

But what?

Off to work now -.-

2011-01-20T00:14:00.002+08:00

Ain't nothing gonna let me down.

2011-01-11T00:13:00.003+08:00

Plus today,i feel awkward in class.

Zara was not being herself.

She was mood-less and it sucks.

I'm paranoid and i always feel that it would always be my fault.

Hate it to the max.

I'm feeling down now.

2011-01-10T18:12:00.002+08:00

Went out with Eddie yesterday.

Followed my best friend here to buy his school bag.

He was like a small kid going to primary school.

Buying new bag and also shoe for school.

Went out quite early.

Woke him up in the morning and met him at woodlands mrt station at 10.30am.

I thought i was going to be late but he was instead.

Made out way to town.

There were quite a lot of people in the train in the morning.

Didn't know that people like to go out early on a Sunday morning.

Reached town and we went to Tangs.

Found the bag that he wanted.

But he wanted red colour.

So being as handy as always,he save the others shop that sell the bag.

There were far east,pacific plaza,heeren and cineleisuure.

And we went all of the shops.

The best thing is,it started to rain when we were otw to heeren.

So ran and played under the rain.

He said that i was weird girl.

Because most girls would not want to run under the rain.

Because it would ruin there make-up and hair.

But i didn't bother.

I think that i'm a man in a woman body.

We went to Wendy's next to have my breakfast cum lunch.

Bumped into kak nana.

After eating and perspiring,we make our way back to causeway point.

He's working at 3pm so we went bata first to get his business shoe.

As for me,i went home.

Slacked at home and eat.

Slept quite early yesterday.

I had entrepreneurship today.

Wore business casual.

AWKWARD!!

2011-01-04T15:13:00.004+08:00

First day of school was okay i think.

Had an early big breakfast with classmate.

We were craving for the W4 ayam bakar,

So we went there.

The long queue didn't stop us from buying it.

Had our breakfast and head our way back to class.

We had quiz and our team won the quiz.

With two more team also.

Romeo said,he will buy the winner prize.

So we waited till the end of study break 2.

During second break,accompanied the guys for their smoke break.

Ate only bread for lunch.

Stayed in class for a while and headed home.

The stuff had arrived when i'm back.

Mum even change the bed sheet for me,

Love her.

My bed was sooooo comfortable.

Slacked and went sheng shiong with parents.

I knew there were reasons why they want me to go with them,

They want me to carry all the heavy stuff.

Went to shop and save near house.

My intention was just buying powder but instead i went shopping at shop and save,

Bought milk,orange juice,apple juice and yogurt there.

I was in happy mood i think.

Headed home and rest.

Switch on the air-conditioner and music on loudly.

It was so peaceful at my room.

Did RJ and watch online movies again,

Watched Muallaf.

Good show.

Didn't even thought of studying,

Slept quite late because i can't sleep.

Result in exhaustion in the morning.

Today been okay.

Going to meet Shane later on.

We are okay after the fall.

2010-12-31T14:48:00.004+08:00

I have nothing to update.

My days had been tiring but fun,

Spent my time with work.

Been working and also skipping work.

Its fate that i skip work on Wednesday.

After what happened,i can say i'm lucky.

God still love me and wants the best for me.

Went out that day with Eddie.

Normal outing.

My primary school friend till now.

My best friend who knows me in and out.

Accept me in all ways.

Perangai Budak Gemok.

He was sick on that day.

Cranky at night.

So hard to tolerate.

But lucky i know him long enough to tolerate with it.

Went back quite late.

From Gelare at Suntec.

We went movie at Marina Square.

Meet the Parents:Little Fockers

4/5

Next were "lepak" at Esplanade.

M&M place.

Around 9 plus or 10,make our way to raffles place mrt.

We chose longer route.

Laughed at each other.

Remembering all the Primary School moment.

Total,i had fun.

But the most special moment that i kept in my heart were the finale of YOG.

That night was memorable.

Full moon + Fireworks + Sea + Eddie= Unspeakable.

Plan for today would be meeting my best buds.

Who is also guy.

Why do i have a feeling that most of my best friends are guys.

Well minus the fact that i love my girlfriends too.

Especially Zara and Eyla.

Today plan would be going to mustafa centre.

I don't know why.

Just going with the flow.

And i got to know that the cute guy that all my colleagues had been talking is my best friend brother.

I didn't know about it until i talked with fir yesterday.

How slow can i be.

No wonder he looked at me like he know me.

Especially the younger brother.

I should get going now.

Get ready and meet them.

My life seem more relax now.

Not hectic anymore.

Thank god for it.

2010-12-29T10:45:00.002+08:00

I had a weird dream yesterday.

I dreamed about her yesterday.

She was wearing cold storage uniform with the apron and all.

I was about to board the mrt while she was alighting.

She was drunk or crazy i think.

Was acting like a drunk girl and staring at me.

Feels like all of this happen because of me.

Am i the one to be blame?

I had fun at work.

But it was so tiring.

Short of cashiers but we pulled it through.

Christmas time was hectic.

The crowd was large.

In a day my sales could reach till 12 000+

Getting my pay today.

And going out with E

Random outing but i love it.

I should get going now.

Toodles

2010-12-17T22:45:00.004+08:00

This is why i love them so much.

They will entertain my craziness and take as many pictures as possible.

I think i have hundreds of their picture in my desktop.

I think i should buy a hard disk so that i can keep it safe there.

There;s too much picture that i get confused sometimes.

Well,i went to the east side today.

Went Ehub with eyla,zara,PY,hafiz and mahirah.

We went to play bowling.

It was my virgin bowl.

Yes,i went longkang a lot of times.

But hey,i'm not the last okay.

I did scored a spare i think.

The points were quite bad.

But i did tried my best for a first timer.

After all the laughing,we had dinner at MacDonald.

Thought of having something else.

But all was finding for Wifi.

Submit my 400 words RJ.

By 7 plus,played monopoly deal with PY.

Around 8 plus,headed our way home.

The rest went early,so left me,PY and eyla.

Took 89 then transfered 161.

PY was being annoying.

I was unsure where to stop.

He kept on lying to me where to stop.

But once i see the bus stop,i knew i had to get down.

So took 161 alone.

Slept in the bus and reached woodlands after half an hour.

It was freaking fast.

I'm tired now.

I should finish up what i need to do and sleep.

Tomorrow i got nothing on.

I shall rest and do all the house chores.

The house is in the mess after mum and the rest came back home.

It was so tidy when there were at Jakarta.

Toodles.

2010-12-15T16:10:00.002+08:00

How i wish i look happy like this in reality.

Shit keeps coming to me.

This is life right.

But i wonder,when will it stops.

Karma is a bitch.

But life have to move on.

Things change and i know there gonna be a brighter end at the end of things.

Patience is all i have for now.

I will just wait and see what fate have install for me.

Holiday in 2 days time.

2 week is better than nothing right.

I feel like skipping school tomorrow.

Not skipping but partialing.

Yes.

On friday going to have fun with my dear classmate.

Celebrate the holiday.

They are all i have now.

They were there when i'm down and happy.

They were there when i cried.

I think that at every semester,theres going to be a day that i will break down in class.

Last semester happened too.

Friends are not forever.

But just treasure them when they are there.

I'm too naive.

If people does not understand what we are going through than why bother.

If they feel that we are taking them for granted than heck care.

If they can feel that,so can we.

But we decide to say out.

So it is my fault that things happen.

If my face is pissing u off then i will get out of ur way.

Maybe i will change my idea of quitting after chinese new year.

Maybe i will quit soon.

I had enough with people assuming things about me.

Stop blaming people for ur "driftness".

It was not my intention.

But its choice that u took.

I always think what i want to say .

And that is why i chose not to share my feelings to everyone.

DO u think by u telling everyone ur story,people actually care.

They are hearing for the sake of hearing.

Stop praising people who are just two-faced.

Soon u will realize who actually cares for u deeply.

Consoling people is easy but what they say are really sincere or just trying to treat ur heart.

Truth hurts but its better than hiding behind the bush.

If u feel that they are the only one who is sincere to talk and enjoy their time with u then,its up to u.

Good frens is not only there for u during ur ups but all when u are about to fall.

Recall back who were there when u feel so down.

Do they even bother to meet u just to listen to ur sorrow.

I guess no right.

Its coincidence that u have to share at work and i were not there.

SO is it my fault that i didn't know ur problem

Is it my fault that i can;t contact u when u are working and ask how are u.

Just because they are there recently,i am taken as a selfish bitch.

I don't need to tell u what u treat u as because if u really said that u care for me,u will know.

Do u think anybody would bother crying when someone who she treat as a sister said that you are taking them for granted.

They would probably fuck care about it.

Its not me who neglect you.

But its you.

When i tried talking to you,where were u.

Either u are at work,busy serving customer,home or buzy talking to ur loyal frens.

So who neglects who.

So is it wrong for me to make myself busy.

Why should u be free and keep on thinking about all this shit.

You didn't know how hurt i am don't u.

I was always the wrong one right.

Suits u.

Have it ur.

See for yourself.

Figure out who was there for u.

I was nothing to you.

And i will remain like this.

Have a good enjoyable day with ur dear colleagues who cares so much about you.

U finally make me realized that distance does affect a relationship.

Thank you for being there for me when i was down.

Ur words will remain in me forever.

Find me when u feel that u need someone to talk to..

I never hate u.

And i will never will.

If treating me like i'm a stranger at work will make it better than i'm fine with it.

Take care.

2010-12-15T10:13:00.001+08:00

Fuck

2010-12-14T15:25:00.001+08:00

Happy yet?

2010-12-14T13:17:00.003+08:00

I feel like crying again now.

It is so hard to be thinking about all this mes..

I'm weak.

Yes i know that.

My life suck at the moment.

Too much things going on.

Fuck.

2010-12-13T22:27:00.002+08:00

I've been feeling lonely again.

Sometimes i feel like crying so loud .

I'm having emotion breakdown.

Seems like no one would understand me.

People might say they do,but i think no.

Because i don't know what i'm going through right now.

Days after days,a lot of things is playing in my head.

I'm thinking too much now a days.

My heart is not at ease.

I should start to pray again.

Since i skipped praying,i've been getting this feelings.

I may look whinny and all.

But it hurts actually hearing that

Just that i kept quite and act like it is all jokes.

Jokes are funny but it actually hurt someone feelings.

I'm not supportive or anything but think about my feelings too okay.

No,i don't have anyone to talk to.

If i do have,they will just think i'm stupid.

Because i'm thinking about things that i shouldn't think at all.

But thats my point.

I'm thinking too much.

Yes,i'm running to blog instead.

Friends don't last forever right.

Sometimes u feel that they are the world to u.

But after not being there for a few days,all change.

I'm like a stranger.

I think i should quit work soon.

I have no passion to the work already

I can;t even concentrate at work.

I keep on daydreaming that the customer have to attract my attention

I just need my holiday.

I want to lie on the bed and not to think anything.

I should do that today.

I will lie there until i sleep.

Why i'm like crying now.

No clue -.-

2010-12-01T22:48:00.002+08:00

Work on monday.

Went back home late because i was waiting for kak she.

Had headache after running in the rain.

Took the panadol from the office.

I was super tired at work.

I got no energy to greet the customer.

Skipped work on tuesday.

CMI.

Had to rest at home.

But before that,accompany sihua to meet her supplier.

Waiting for my refund.

Then went to causeway point to find my shampoo and stuff.

Had UT today.

I was horrible i think.

My brain stopped thinking.

My throat hurts so much.

I'm sick but i'm denying it.

I had no mood in class.

Only for a while.

Only zara knows why.

After Ut headed to sihua's class.

Met her for a while then teach her maths.

It was surprising that i was teaching her.

But before that went to have my lunch or should i say dinner.

Stayed till 6+ and went home.

Rest for a while and went causeway point for a while.

Bought dad his belated birthday present.

Then waited for Eddie.

Took the name card that sister need.

Then went slack with him.

Now i just got home.

I almost forgot to do my RJ.

I should go now.

Bye

2010-11-30T15:46:00.004+08:00

I should update this blog of mine

I'm not that active at tumblr too.

Life been busy.

I like it this way.

At least i have something to do rather than sit at home and do nothing.

Work on Saturday and Sunday

From 12.30 to closing.

Dead tired.

Went home alone.

With music blasting.

Have to distract myself from thinking too much.

I've been thing unnecessary stuff.

With family,friends and other.

Things with mom is resolve.

Things at work too.

I may be selfish but i have to do what i need to do.

I really should start thinking about myself than putting others first.

I'm not staying that i'm that good bitch but i tends to too nice to people.

While the fact is that i'm not.

Maybe i'm afraid of karma.

I don't want karma to strike again.

Maybe what is happening is all my fault for my past.

But what is done is done

I apologize to whom i had hurt

It's not my intention but it just happened.

I'm not perfect and this things just had happened.

Trust is not there so why should i think too much.

Saying you trust me is not enough.

Because actions speak louder than words.

Remember when u always asked me if i really when to school.

Fuck yeah i was at school.

U should actually see my attendance.

I'm a person who attends school diligently.

It proves that u don't trust me.

If i can trust u after all the lying u did to everyone,why can't u trust me.

I'm not giving excuses to prove that i was wrong.

But its not anyone's wrong.

This is fate.

Its just that i chose to go with the fate first.

Love does not matters if there is no trust.

You may say u are a honest person but it is up to us to judge you.

So i think that its up to the person what they think is important to them.

Life please be nice to me from now on okay.

2010-11-28T00:38:00.003+08:00

I'll disappear for a while.

I'll be on tumblr.

My life is HECTIC right now.

2010-11-22T15:12:00.004+08:00

Its Monday.

I had a head aching sunday.

It went well in the morning.

But in the afternoon,headache just had to come.

Took the panadol in the office.

Pop two of it and went back at 8.

Reached home,passed mom the dried mango.

She just love it.

I love it too!!

Bought only two yesterday.

I'm not working in the weekdays this week.

I'm so thankful for it.

Lesser time for work but longer time for me.

I need to stay at home and reflect on my life.

My life is going upside down.

I need to decide what i want in life.

I can't just stay here and being left hanging.

I'm nothing to u already.

I can feel it.

Try to make it normal,but its not.

Its different now.

And u know it.

I need to choose the best for me.

Shane liar!!

Never contact me till now!

I'm waiting bitch!

I thought i can forget it.

But i can't.

People are the reason why i can't forget.

Having lesser time at work is good actually.

I can have my sleep and also my time now.

No more a good girl who go work everyday.

I have my life.

I need my life back.

Move on now.

People don't need me so why stay.

It obviously.

Who's being priorities?

Not me right.

I'm tired of being patience.

People took it for granted.

I'm left heartbroken.

I may look strong.

But i'm not.

I can't just sit here and think that everything gonna be okay when i know its not.

I'm sorry

But i just can't do this anymore.

It's up to you now

You can have all your time with her now.

I'm tired of giving in.

When i know that they will not give in to me.

I'm not changing but i just need to decide for my life.

I can't sit here and let fate answer this.

Have a wonderful life with her.

Be faithful.

Take care of your health.

I'm still here IF you need me.

Goodbye~

xoxo

2010-11-20T20:30:00.003+08:00

Sorry for the late update.

Been busy with school and work.

Its taking most of my time.

Monday

Had maths UT!

It was so messed up.

Too much repeated question.

Better have a retest right

Tuesday

Work

Wednesday

It was Hari raya haji.

Mom cook raya food.

Ate and got ready to work.

Yes!

I was working that day.

I forgot that it was hari raya haji.

So i work that day.

Took Kak Zaitoon shift.

Let her celebrate with her family.

Had no plans on that too so why waste my day at home right.

Thursday

Work.

Last day Art working.

Went home with kak She.

Met art at kranji to say goodbye.

So yesterday.

I skipped work.

I was too tired and i got something on.

Watched Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows.

Okay,i watched it twice.

What can i say,i love it too much.

I thought of studying just now.

But instead i had movie marathon.

Too lazy to study.

I shall study a little bit.

Working tomorrow.

Working from 10am to 8pm.

Straight home and study i think.

I gaining weight.

I should stop eating too much.

But i can't.

I tried eating little but its the same thing

I should just go on a rice diet and the habit not to eat at night.

I shall go jogging too.

Only on the days i'm not working.

I forgot to say to my workplace that i don't want to work next week.

Dang.!

2010-11-14T19:57:00.002+08:00

I've been keeping things to myself lately.

Had no one to share it out.

Maybe there is but i didn't want to bother people with my problems.

Not having enough sleep lately too.

Been to busy with school and work.

Slept late yesterday and had to wake up early.

Had only 6 hour sleep after the whole day working.

Work.

Don't talk about it.

Getting tired and exhausted with the customer.

Having so many fussy customers.

Colleagues

Ok la

Some are pain in the a**.

Having UTs

I hate to study for it.

I have no time for myself and also people does not have time for me.

Fair.??

What is definition for fair?

I don't think it is fair at all.

I'm tired with excuses.

urgghh.

2010-11-10T20:49:00.003+08:00

Its cold in the MacDonald.

I need the toilet too.

I'm studying Cognitive and Maths alone.

What a weird thing to do.

I don't study.

But this time round i'm studying.

Read through all the notes.

Wrote some too.

I guess Cognitive is okay.

I get all of it.

Only maths is killing me.

I can't concentrate already.

My laptop batt going to die soon.

I should close my laptop and eat my dinner first.

Waiting for Art too.

So gonna eat slowly while waiting for him.

See u soon.

2010-11-08T20:43:00.002+08:00

Its been so long since i updated.

I got a lot of thing to let out but i'm too lazy to type it out.

Just let it be between me and me.

People are running away from u.

You know who u are.

I know u always read my blog too.

You've been treating me differently.

I don't know what i did.

I know u told me that if u disappear one day,don't find u.

But u didn't disappear.

You still appear at work but giving me a cold shoulder,

I should tumblr now.

Chiao.

2010-11-02T08:48:00.002+08:00

why must life be so hard.

I don't know what is it so wrong about me.

If sharing my problem with someone is wrong then i shall just keep quite then

Let all the problem i have to myself then.

If it hurt and make u angry then that's what shall do.

Its like everything that i do is wrong.

Why is that so wrong.

How hard i try to be good but in the end i will still look bad.

Not only i have to keep all the pain,but now i have to keep it from everyone.

I should just keep my mouth shut at the first place right.

I won't show my sadness.

Gonna let it be there inside.

I think the Love the way you lie suits me right now.

Feel like crying again.

I should just blast my ears with music for the moment.

Feeling all shitty right now.

Without u knowing,u had hurt me so much.

But did i show it out.Did i be angry with u.

No,i didn't.

I kept quite to avoid fighting.

I try to be positive in everything even if it hurts me in the end.

But u never know.

U only thought that i was just trying to make u angry.

I never once want to make u angry.

Because i will be the one who will be hurt.

But things are bound to happen.

I can't force it to stop.

2010-11-01T10:14:00.002+08:00

Been working from Wednesday.

Skipped work on Friday.

Saturday was not a busy day.

It was actually a fun day.

People were dressed up in their Halloween.

Some were scary and some were lame.

Laughed a lot.

Did closing.

Art waited for me.

Went home with Kak She and Art.

Laughed a lot too in the train.

Slept late.

Watched paranormal activity 1 and 2 again with sister.

Got nothing to do.

Woke up late on Sunday.

Actually quite early.

Only had 6 hour sleep.

Went out with mum to sheng shiong before going to work.

Reached work freaking early.

Work and went home late.

Went home with Kak She and Sha.

Art had to go off early.

Don't want to elaborate it any longer.

Was pissed at that moment.

Was having stomach cramps.

Plus the Freaking flirty girl did not help at all.

My brain is hurting.

Sleepy and no mood at all.

Fuck her life la.

I can't stand her.

One after one.

I need a wish right now!!

2010-10-29T22:30:00.002+08:00

I skipped work today.

Was not feeling well in school just now.

Having stomach ache all day long.

It is stomach ache or menstruation cramp.?

They were short of people.

But i think that my health is much more important.

Sorry Shane Lim for not coming to work.

I know it is a busy day.

School been very busy.

Module are getting harder and have to work extra hard to solve it.

Sometime i have to skip lunch to finish up the work.

Entrepreneurship module and faci really getting on my nerves.

Its getting harder and the stupid faci is getting irritating.

The stupid guy whom i dislike so much is in my group.

How am i suppose to work with him for 10 more weeks?

GOSH!!

Not only the guy but also the faci.

Work been giving me closing shift.

I don't like.

I prefer working in the morning.

Doing closing is very rushing.

Working tomorrow and Sunday.

I have no life.

People are having fun on weekend.

While i'm spending my time at work.

Great!

I will stop now and update tomorrow i guess.

Toodles.

2010-10-29T15:15:00.001+08:00

I may not be updating much here.

I'll be at tumblr if u need to find me..

I will update soon.

Promise.

2010-10-27T08:28:00.000+08:00

I'm sleepy.

i want to sleep.

Shall update mu tumblr instead.

2010-10-26T21:08:00.001+08:00

Went to Waterfront with Shane Lim yesterday.

Ended school at 3.30pm.

Waited for her at OCS.

I freaking told her to switch on her phone so easy for me to contact her.

But her stubborn to big.

Never listen.

So tried calling and calling but no sound at all.

Lucky when she reached woodlands,she called me.

If not i would like have went home just like that.

She was so sweet lah.

Even bought for me food.

Like as if we going picnic like that.

Walked from RP to Waterfront.

Was freaking far la.

But walking with her,made it so near.

Was surprised that i was not tired at all.

Find a place to sit.

Played monopoly deal first.

She was noob.

Then ate the food she bought.

Storytelling with her.

Everything was let out yesterday.

Felt relieved after that.

Only she can understand my situation.

Thankful to have her in my life.

Went back around 6.45pm.

Walked to her house area.

Took 903 and walked back home.

After so long of not walking home.

Finally i did yesterday.

THANK YOU SHANE LIM!!<3

2010-10-26T19:57:00.002+08:00

I'm lost.

Since when did i not feel lost.

Am i too naive or simply stupid.

2010-10-26T10:50:00.002+08:00

In the state of confusion right now.

Please show me the way God.

For once i need a clue on what to do.

There so much that i want to ask from you.

But in this i really need a clue.

Never did i feel clueless on what to do.

I thought it would be easy.

But no its not.

The more i'm far from u.

The more problems come to me.

Show me the way back home.

I need your help.

Change before its to late Atikah.

That's the only way out now.

2010-10-25T16:10:00.002+08:00

Waiting for shane at OCS!

I freaking told her to turn on her phone but she still didn't

How am i suppose to find her then.

Its not like i have the ability to know where she is right.

While waiting,i shall update this blog.

I freaking hate marketing because i can't understand the faci.

And also because the freaking module is just crap.

Like seriously can problem stop coming to me already.

I had too much to think about already.

Enough is enough.

If only i can say it all out then it will be great.

But instead i have to shut my freaking mouth

and accept all of this.

FML!

SHane Lim u better come faster.

I'm super bored at the OCS!

fall

2010-10-23T12:59:00.002+08:00

Working today

Going out in 1 hour time.

Working till closing today

I have no life.

School,work and then school again

I'm working tomorrow also.

I should have took my Sunday off.

But i had no plans so better off i go to work right

My legs is aching.

Muscle cramp.

I'm hungry but mummy didn't cook.

Going to buy something before work start.

But i'm lazy.

Going off.Toodles

2010-10-22T10:18:00.002+08:00

Not fun.

Very bored today.

I feel like sleeping in class now.

Watched Paranormal Activity 2 with the new classmate yesterday.

It was freaking suspense.

It was slow at first like usual.

But when night comes,everyone will have a silent scream.

I would say that it is 7/10

The last part so scary.

My new classmate is great.

I got my camwhoring friend already.

Need more participation

Working today for sure.

Today surely have a lot of people

Busy day.

Can i like work at 5.30-to 9.30.

Instead of 6.30-10.30pm.

Surely tired.

Confirm tomorrow i'm having morning shift.

CMI

I should concentrate on Entrepreneurship right. -.-

2010-10-17T21:22:00.002+08:00

LOVE IS STUPID.

AND I AM STUPID ENOUGH TO FALL FOR IT.

I've been tumblr-ing a lot.

It is so much fun.

It distract me from thinking a lot.

It makes me happy to see all the pretty pictures and quotes

It makes me less lonely when shane is not online

When she online,i feel super happy.

It feels like as if i have someone to go to when i'm down.

SHE'S THE ONE THAT I FIND WHEN I FEEL THAT WORLD IS CRUSHING DOWN ON ME!

Don't leave me okay.

I still need u to be here.

I need your motivational words.

In another word, I JUST NEED YOU!.

As friend okay people.

okay not as a normal friend.

But a CLOSE FRIEND.

A FRIEND THAT IS CLOSE TO MY HEART.!

STAY.

2010-10-16T22:14:00.002+08:00

I'm becoming weaker.

Its my fault

I was the one who choose this way.

It's not easy but i have to right.

I try not to let this thing to distract my studies

Because i know my studies is more important than this.

But i can't hide the fact that my feelings is not stable now.

I need my friends

I need my hugs.

I seriously need someone to talk to.

The more i think the more sad i get.

I'm crying and i don;t like it.

I will try to forget about it for a moment

I'll try my best

I can do it right?

2010-10-15T11:09:00.002+08:00

Yes

I'm blogging in class.

Entrepreneurship is not going into my brain.

I'm too shagged to understand what the faci talking about,

Gosh!

I'm getting along with my new classmate.

They are all a great people.

Having work today!

Tired to the max!

DONE!

p.s: i'll be watching u cunning little girl!!

2010-10-13T23:20:00.002+08:00

I CANNOT SLEEP.!!!

BEING VERY PARANOID TODAY!

CAIYUN LIM SHANE!!

THANK YOU FOR ENTERTAINING ME!

THANK YOU FOR DISTRACTING ME FROM THINKING ABOUT HIM!!

U AND YOUR CAKE!!

CAN MAKE ME GO CRAZY!!

OF COURSE I WILL GIVE YOU OKAY!!

CRAZY WOMAN!!I PURPOSELY PUT PICTURE FOR LAH!!

ME HEART U OKAY!!

CAKE CAKE CAKE CAKE!!<3

2010-10-11T19:39:00.002+08:00

What am i left with.

Nothing right.

Second party will remain second right

It's my risk.

But i chose to go for it.

So who's now feeling the hurt.

Myself.

There's no one to be blame except for me.

I'm not being paranoid or anything.

But i'm a person who needs attention.

When i don't get it.

This is how i am.

Paranoid.

I'm lucky that school reopens tomorrow.

At least i won't be thinking about him 24/7.

Karma strikes and it strikes twice.

I hate being stress.

Because what i will do is

EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT.

I ate a lot today.

I had nasi lemak for breakfast.

Then chips,then rice,then pasta and more junk food.

I have to control my eating.

I promise!

Bake Marble Cake with mum today.

The color is very pretty.

Instead of the typical chocolate,we made it PINK!!

ME LIKE IT!!

Not sure what to wear tomorrow!!

Meeting Shane during lunch!!

YAY!!

She helps me a lot today.

Without her, i would probably break down by now.

I may had dislike her last time.

But things change.

She made me stronger.

She made me feel that i'm needed.

She knows what i'm going through right now.

I appreciate so much!

Thanks for the encouragement words.

You change my mood entirely.

Thank you SAYANG!!!

2010-10-07T11:18:00.002+08:00

I knew it from the start.

It was because of a second party.

I'm strong enough to go through this.

My life is more complicated now.

Results are out.

I pass.

The End!

PATHETIC MUCH -.-

2010-10-01T12:33:00.002+08:00

I'm back to being as clueless as ever

I just got my pay but i not sure how to spend it.

Celebrated GF's birthday.

Treated her to Swensen's dinner.

After that withdraw money to give to mama.

So now,what should i buy next.

I thought of buying either vans shoe or birkenstock sandal.

Going out with Maisarah later on.

To town again.

Then maybe to bugis.

Not sure yet.

He's mad cause i didn't tell him i'm going out today.

It was a last minute plan actually.

Early in the morning then we thought of going out.

Off to get ready now

Toodles

2010-09-29T23:36:00.002+08:00

Basically i can't sleep.

I dead tired but i just can'r sleep.

Working in the morning again tomorrow.

Working from 10 am to 4.30pm

Probably extending it till 6.

Most probably..

Not sure yet.

School are starting soon.

I am still in the working mood.

I am not sure how i'm going to school later on.

Cause now in my mind is all about work.

That's bad actually.

I'm tired of counting money all day long.

Almost fainted just now.

Was super tired and thirsty.

But the customer kept coming so i can't stop and drink water.

Customers are very irritating.

They tend to come at the same time.

If there are short of cashier then it will mean that i have to double up my speed.

It's tired okay.

When there are no people then it will be so relaxing.

When there are a lot of people then it will be like crazy.

Having no one in mind right now.

Maybe there is.

But i'm keeping it low profile.

Dayah surprised me just now.

I was busy scanning the item.

When suddenly,my butt was being hit.

I thought it was my colleague

But when i turned around,it was her.

SO happy to see her.

She made me more alert.

I was so sleepy just now.

But when i saw her.i can't stop talking.

Glad that she stopped by.

She most probably working at Centrepoint too.

So can get to see her more.

E25A are making BBQ.

But then the day are still not confirm.

If they making it on my working day then i can't make it la.

Cannot keep on skipping work right.

I want go watch movie with someone!!

Go and ask your off okay.

I'm waiting.!!!!

2010-09-26T17:42:00.002+08:00

OMG!!!

I'm freaking bored to the max.

I have no idea why i even want to blog this blog of mine.

Having off is so bored.

Having work is so tiring.

What do i actually want.?

I'm not so sure myself,

Life been up and down.

So many hypocrites around.

I'm so sick of them.

I'm not even sure who to believe.

Just gonna follow my instinct.

That would be th e best way for me now.

Friends are no where to be found.

Secondary and Poly friends are both busy with their own stuff.

I want to go out today.

But i am just freaking lazy to move my butt out.

People are all excited about the F1.

While for me,i have no interest in it.

E and me are drifting away.

No msges or calls.

So i treat it as "lets just be friends".

Sometimes i hate myself.

Why do i always care about people feelings so much and didn't bother my own.

It was like this too when i was in a r/s.

Now when i'm single,things like this still happen.

What do get from the patience.

NOTHING!

I'm just gonna be left hurt while they are all having fun.

Why give hope when theres no promise to be a happily ever after.

How dumb can i be not to notice that people are just playing on me.

Not referring to anyone.

But it just that sometime,i feel do helpless and clueless

I don't know what gonna happen to me next.

Life are so complicated sometime.

Gonna just let time solve the feelings i'm having.

The song "love the way you lie" is perfect for my situation. ):

2010-09-26T14:35:00.002+08:00

Well E,i know that all u said were lies.

I'm not stalking but i know what is going on.

Lies.

2010-09-25T20:26:00.003+08:00

Back to blogging after a few days of not updating.

Been very busy with work.

Monday

Went to work at 10am.

Do normal stuff and finished work by 8pm.

Waited for Art and then went home.

Was very exhausted when reached home.

Slept and didn't have time to update.

Tuesday

Woke up early.

Had Checkout training at aljunied.

Should have went with Shane.

But she woke up late.

So i left first and reached the place around 8.50am

The course was 9-5pm.

By lunch, i was already sleepy

Learned a lot of things there.

We back to Centrepoint for a while.

Said hi to the rest and went to have dinner.

Had dinner at Cahaya with Shane.

After eating,head our way home.

Wednesday

Same thing again.

Had course and after course went back to work place.

Waited for ART to finish work.

Headed home after that.

By then,i was tired.

Thursday

Last day of course.

Did all the transaction smoothly.

Passed my test.

Completed the course with flying colors.

Went back to workplace to put our stuff.

A small tiff happened between Shane and Art.

Headed to bugis for a while.
By 3 plus,made my way home.

Mum was surprised to see me back so early.

Rested and slept early.

Friday

Had worked.

Worked from 10am to 9.30pm

I was suppose to be done by 8pm.

But due to one of the auntie wants to go home,i took over her shift.

I didn't mind it cause i still have to wait for Art.

So rather than me sitting there doing nothing.

Might as well i extend my shift.

Head home together.

Reached home late.

Bathed and straight head to bed

Saturday(today)

Accompanied mum to Polyclinic again.

See the doctor and took the medicine.

Had our breakfast at Teh Tarik.

I wanted to eat porridge but the shop was closed.

So instead,we had Lontong.

After filling our stomach,we went to Sheng Shiong.

Wanted to buy prawns,but after seeing the price,we went back.

The price near my house was more cheaper than there.

So helped mum to cook and rested after that.

Sister friend came so i stayed in my room.

Didn't bother to go out.

Wash the dishes after they are done and rotted at home.

Did nothing actually.

Just washing the dishes and played laptop.

Pak Long is outside now.

Served the food and drinks.

Now i got nothing to do.

They should be going home soon i think.

U can see how bored i am right.

I actually write my whole week here.

Gosh,tomorrow going to be another lifeless day at home -.-

Toodles for now

P.S.: I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT I ACTUALLY TYPE ALL OF THIS OUT

WHAT A LONG UPDATE!

IT HAS BEEN SO LONG SINCE I UPDATED THIS LONG!

2010-09-21T23:10:00.001+08:00

so u think u can make my life fucked up!

THINK AGAIN!!

i am not as weak as u think i am!!

i'm gonna see how long this will go.

having fun right?? -.-

2010-09-19T18:32:00.001+08:00

I CUT MY FREAKING LONG LONG HAIR!!!!

I MISS IT!!

BUT I'M STARTING TO LOVE MY SHORT HAIR NOW.

DOING BANGS=HORRIBLE FOREHEAD AFTERWARDS

2010-09-19T11:53:00.002+08:00

I'm having a stupid headache right now

Thanx to not enough sleep.

The day before,i only got 4 hour of sleep.

Accompany mum to clinic.

Then yesterday i only slept from 3m to 8am.

FML.

Being forced to wake up.

Like seriously,i need some rest right.

Yesterday hari raya-ing was fun.

We went to a lot of houses.

Went out at 3pm plus.

Reached home at 2am.

Luckily we rented a van.

If not then i don;t know how to get back.

I got no mood to blog actually.

Got work today.

But overslept so didn't went for it.

Look likes there is so many people reading my blog.

But i don't know who.

Feel like privatizing the blog.

Should or shouldn't i?

2010-09-18T13:25:00.002+08:00

While waiting for my friends to reach,i shall update this blog

They will be coming here first around 3.

So for now,i shall chill.

Getting ready at about 2.

That should be enough time right.

Maisarah renting the van.

So if it rains,we are save from it.

I'm super shagged from yesterday.

Slept at about 2 plus and was woken up by mummy at 7am.

Accompany mummy to polyclinic.

After that went to Sheng Shiong to buy stuff.

Carry all of the thing home.

Reached home,cleaned the house and helped mummy with the cooking.

She's cooking mee soto and mee goreng.

That's a lot.

Just finish peeling the potatoes for the begedil.

I shall bath again later.

It is so freaking warm here even though it's about to rain.

I shall my wear my wedges today.

Too tired to wear the high heels from yesterday.

Not sure yet.

Shall see later.

Mummy allows me to go JB tomorrow.

If the plan is still on i guess. (:

Shall end now.

Bringing camera along later!!!!

2010-09-17T23:46:00.002+08:00

She just had to ruined my night right.

Get a life can.

I'm not sure why i am acting like this.

Maybe it is because you are just trying to make me jealous.

It won't work on me.

I'm stronger than what u think i am.

Although you're older,it does not mean i have to follow your rules.

Things happened right.

Testing my patience won't work.

Been through a lot more worst thingS than this.

I can do it!!

I KNOW I CAN!

JUST BE PATIENCE OKAY ATIKAH!

2010-09-17T23:33:00.004+08:00

(the rest is at facebook)

I had so much fun time with HAFSAH,SYUHADA CHONG,MUHD HAIKAL AND MUHD NASRUL!

Even though there were only 5 of us,but it felt like as if there 10 of us.

The planned was destroyed as usual.

Thanx to Muhd Haikal.

However, our planned to go jalan raya still happened.

Went out at around 3.

Quite late.

The planned was suppose to be at 11.30.

But someone just choose to sleep.

So we went to Syuhada house first.

Ate rendang with bread.

Next was Hafsah.

Her house were at Bedok.

We went back and forth due to some houses can only make it at night.

Had a splendid time with them

All the laughter and jokes.

Took picture at every house.

Except for Nasrul and Haikal.

We were rushing because haikal got to go work at night.

Didn't ate much.

Just drink and eat kuihs.

That's what i did today.

Tomorrow going to be a another day with the EX-Classmate and friends!!

Can't wait!

Till tomorrow!

Toodles.

2010-09-15T23:44:00.002+08:00

I broke my promise on not to blog today with someone.

But the urge to blog just come.

So i will blog today.(a short one)

My day today was the same.

Went to work in the morning.

Woke up around 7 plus

Then went back to sleep.

I did the same thing over and over again.

At around 9 plus finally woke up and switch on laptop.

Check facebook and stuff and got ready to go to work

The rain was not helping.

It made me more lazy to go to work.

Went out at about 10.45am

Reach there,changed and start counting my float.

Art was so sweet.

Waited for me to go break then u also go break with me.

Brought for him hari raya kuihs.

Ate instant for lunch today.

Of course i was full.

If it was me a few months ago,i don't think that would be enough.

But since working there,i have been eating less.

Went home at 8pm.

Went home alone.

Today there's no one accompanying me home):

Sad indeed.

Reach home,headed to kitchen.

I was pleasantly happy when i see mama cooked my favorite veggie.

At Cold Storage it is called chokkos if i'm not wrong.

Mama call it something else.

Ate a lot tonight.

Only tonight right.

She even bought fried chicken.

How am i suppose to resist that.

I can't right.

So i ate two bowls of rice today.

It was like my breakfast,lunch and dinner meal.

Chatted with Art for a while just now.

Being told to sleep now but i blogged instead.(:

I think i should head out to sleep now.

Don't want to get scolded for sleeping late right.

So GOOD NIGHT PEOPLE!

2010-09-14T23:00:00.002+08:00

I've been slacking

Too busy to update this dusty old blog of mine.

Exam are over.

But still my life been the same.

Spent my time with family on the first and second day of Hari Raya.

On Sunday i had to work.

Worked from 12.30 to 10.3.0pm

Freaking tired.

That's what u get when u get use of not working for 3days.

Work been okay i guess.

Went home with art on Sunday.

Waited for me to finish to count the money and off we went.

Went home with Art again on the Monday.

I have accompany now from somerset to woodlands.

Watched Resident Evil:Afterlife.

AWESOME SHOW!

Wentworth Miller was in it.

So it was totally HOT!!.

I'm gonna hit the sack soon.

Tired from sleeping late and waking up early.

Gonna be a good girl and sleep early.

Drifting.

2010-09-12T00:39:00.002+08:00

Hari Raya this year is different.

On friday,we went out quite late.

Waited for brother and dad from friday prayers.

Headed our way to the usuals house.

Reach home with Kak Masita family.

It was different because its been a while since there a family coming to our house on the first day.

Forgot to take picture with my cute nephew.

This was them last year hari raya.

Now they have grown up.

End our visiting quite early yesterday.

Today went out around 12.

Went to few houses then make our way home.

I think going out with parents is much better.

For the money part only.

But for the craziness part would be friends.

This is actually a random post because i'm not sleeping yet.

Gonna hit the sack soon.

Having work tomorrow.

From 12.30 pm to 10.30 pm

Damn tired after tomorrow.

Update soon aite

Toodles

2010-09-02T16:45:00.002+08:00

Since i got free time to blog,i shall blog today.It's been a while since i updated my blog.A lot of things happened.The good and bad things.Good is that,i started working.Bad thing is that it took all my time for myself and also my studies.I got no time to study.Or to be honest,i got no mood to study.When i got time,i would either watch korean drama or sleep.

People are chiong-ing while i'm here skipped work cause i'm sick are blogging.I've been trying to study from just now but my brains chose to shut down.I hate being sick.I takes all my energy even though i can't fast.

Life been okay i guess.Eddie having hard time so i chose to give him time.Distracting my thoughts on him through work.

Work have been tiring.Same routine over and over again.

I get very annoyed when people keep on tweeting about they finishing studying while for me,i'm not even started.I know its my fault but seriously it just make me very panic. -.-

2010-08-13T08:59:00.002+08:00

Hello world!!

Selamat berpuasa semua!!

Today's the third of fasting.

Things are not going well.

Having a bad sore throat.

My throat hurts so bad.

I started working ready too.

Yesterday,were my first day of work.

It went quite well.

Just that i am still not used of standing that long.

After not working for 4 months,i am not used of standing that long anymore.

I hope things will be better.

Working at 6pm again today.

But kak Zaitun off today.

So confirm i have to go training with someone else.

I'm having stomachache.

It hurts.

A lot of obstacles ):

Just have to persevere.

2010-08-11T08:22:00.002+08:00

First day of fasting month.

It's been so long since i blog a proper update.

School had been great.

Fun time together in class.

Changing class soon.

Going to miss some of my friends.

Its the end of my NDP journey.

I miss my RP2!!!

Thanks u guys for the time that we spent together.

Burning our Saturday's for the event!.

Now i got no other plans on Saturday.

Met eddie yesterday.

The last meeting day till the end of fasting month.

We agreed not to meet during the fasting month.

Not sure yet.

Things are going smoothly.

No fights but only happiness.

Hope it will continue till the end.

We are still not officially in relationship yet.

We want to take it slow.

I think we can wait after knowing for 8 years right.

I don't want it to be the typical relationship.

Where the happiness ends after the honeymoon period.

Which is 2 to 3 months.

Today doing maths.

Lazy and sleepy.

Not going to break fast at home.

Having JYOF. -.-

Update soon aite. (:

2010-08-08T22:42:00.002+08:00

Before i start, i would like to say that the previous entry is not about me or my family.

The post is from my friend's blog.

I just repost it.

So yeah, IT GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH MY FAMILY AND I.

I am so excited for tomorrow.

Gonna rock the Padang tomorrow!!

Basically i got nothing to post about.

I just couldn't sleep!!.

I will try to blog on TUESDAY KAY!!

2010-08-06T14:52:00.002+08:00

Hi, Mommy. I'm your baby. You don't know me yet, I'm only a few weeks old. You're going to find out about me soon, though, I promise. Let me tell you some things about me. My name is John, and I've got beautiful brown eyes and black hair. Well, I don't have it yet, but I will when I'm born. I'm going to be your only child, and you'll call me your one and only. I'm going to grow up without a daddy mostly, but we have each other. We'll help each other, and love each other. I want to be a doctor when I grow up.

You found out about me today, Mommy! You were so excited, you couldn't wait to tell everyone. All you could do all day was smile, and life was perfect. You have a beautiful smile, Mommy. It will be the first face I will see in my life, and it will be the best thing I see in my life. I know it already.

Today was the day you told Daddy. You were so excited to tell him about me! ...He wasn't happy, Mommy. He kind of got angry. I don't think that you noticed, but he did. He started to talk about something called wedlock, and money, and bills, and stuff I don't think I understand yet. You were still happy, though, so it was okay. Then he did something scary, Mommy. He hit you. I could feel you fall backward, and your hands flying up to protect me. I was okay... but I was very sad for you. You were crying then, Mommy. That's a sound I don't like. It doesn't make me feel good. It made me cry, too. He said sorry after, and he hugged you again. You forgave him, Mommy, but I'm not sure if I do. It wasn't right. You say he loves you... why would he hurt you? I don't like it, Mommy.

Finally, you can see me! Your stomach is a little bit bigger, and you're so proud of me! You went out with your mommy to buy new clothes, and you were so so so happy. You sing to me, too. You have the most beautiful voice in the whole wide world. When you sing is when I'm happiest. And you talk to me, and I feel safe. So safe. You just wait and see, Mommy. When I am born I will be perfect just for you. I will make you proud, and I will love you with all of my heart.

I can move my hands and feet now, Mommy. I do it because you put your hands on your belly to feel me, and I giggle. You giggle, too. I love you, Mommy.

Daddy came to see you today, Mommy. I got really scared. He was acting funny and he wasn't talking right. He said he didn't want you. I don't know why, but that's what he said. And he hit you again. I got angry, Mommy. When I grow up I promise I won't let you get hurt! I promise to protect you. Daddy is bad. I don't care if you think that he is a good person, I think he's bad. But he hit you, and he said he didn't want us. He doesn't like me. Why doesn't he like me, Mommy?

You didn't talk to me tonight, Mommy. Is everything okay?

It's been three days since you saw Daddy. You haven't talked to me or touched me or anything since that. Don't you still love me, Mommy? I still love you. I think you feel sad. The only time I feel you is when you sleep. You sleep funny, kind of curled up on your side. And you hug me with your arms, and I feel safe and warm again. Why don't you do that when you're awake, any more?

I'm 21 weeks old today, Mommy. Aren't you proud of me? We're going somewhere today, and it's somewhere new. I'm excited. It looks like a hospital, too. I want to be a doctor when I grow up, Mommy. Did I tell you that? I hope you're as excited as I am. I can't wait.

...Mommy, I'm getting scared. Your heart is still beating, but I don't know what you are thinking. The doctor is talking to you. I think something's going to happen soon. I'm really, really, really scared, Mommy. Please tell me you love me. Then I will feel safe again. I love you!

Mommy, what are they doing to me!? It hurts! Please make them stop! It feels bad! Please, Mommy, please please help me! Make them stop!

Don't worry Mommy, I'm safe. I'm in heaven with the angels now. They told me what you did, and they said it's called an abortion.

Why, Mommy? Why did you do it? Don't you love me any more? Why did you get rid of me? I'm really, really, really sorry if I did something wrong, Mommy. I love you, Mommy! I love you with all of my heart. Why don't you love me? What did I do to deserve what they did to me? I want to live, Mommy! Please! It really, really hurts to see you not care about me, and not talk to me. Didn't I love you enough? Please say you'll keep me, Mommy! I want to live smile and watch the clouds and see your face and grow up and be a doctor. I don't want to be here, I want you to love me again! I'm really really really sorry if I did something wrong. I love you!

I love you, Mommy.

Every abortion is just…

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you are against abortion , REBLOG

2010-08-03T09:26:00.002+08:00

Went out on Sunday with this bunch of people.

Only 1/4 of 5N1 is there.

I want all of them to be there.

My Saturday was spent lively as always.

Had NDP preview.

It was great but a few of my group mate fall sick.

The sun was scorching hot.

I am tanned now.

After the event, met eddie.

Happy goobbeerr!!

Went home with him.

Sunday plan was suppose to be going to bottle tree.

But we went Yishun Safra instead.

Headed to Northpoint to have dinner.

Played bluff and headed home.

Had fun with all of them!

2010-07-26T08:34:00.002+08:00

Have not be updating much.

Friday

Ends school's by 3.15pm

Headed to TRCC to take T-shirts.

Then boarded the bus to Clarke Quay

There were Nasrul,Louis,Hafsah and Haikal.

It was quite boring.

But when the event starts,i was hyper.

Shouting out loud to the music.

Headed to MRT.

But made a lot of pit stop.

First we went to Clarke Quay then Boat Quay then City Hall.

By the time we reach City Hall, i was already tired.

Reach home around 11 plus.

Slept quite late.

Saturday

Woke up like usual.

Got ready and went out for NDP.

I was not having fun and not in the mood.

After the rehearsal, slack with group.

Then, i had so much fun.

I want to upload video but its taking so much time.

Head home the same like Friday.

Sunday

Did housework like normal.

Bath and played lappy.

By 2 headed out to Faiz house.

around 2.15 get out from his house and went to causeway point.

Met Alif and make our way to City Hall.

They went Peninsula to survey guitar pick-up.

Went to Firdaus house and gave him the cake.

It was a very belated birthday.

Went back home and slack all the way.

Monday

Wear formal today.

I am bored to death.

Shall stop now!!

2010-07-23T08:50:00.002+08:00

Yesterday lesson was great!

A different way to present.

I paid attention to their presentation.

Good Job.

So during lunch went Causeway Point to buy ticket for Despicable Me.

It was tiring.

After class,headed to booklink to buy Instant Noodle.

So long never eat that.

So sat in class and eat.

Watched Toy story 3 half-way.

Headed to W1 for the Samsung Human Torch.

Checked whether my name is there.

It was.!!

I am sorry RP2, i can't make it today ):

Yesterday got home late,today too!!

And also tomorrow and Sunday.

Monday going to me tiring as i won't get enough sleep.

I would probably update soon.

The urge to blog is decreasing so probably going to blog once in 2 days or something.

2010-07-22T08:58:00.001+08:00

Lazy to update today.

Update soon!

2010-07-21T09:05:00.003+08:00

Yeah,i ditched my idea of updating thrice yesterday.

Too lazy to put all the formal picture here.

It can be found in my Facebook.

Yesterday after class,went to causeway point with friends.

Was wearing heels and it was freaking tiring walking so me and hafsah took the bus.

Headed to Gelare but it was pack.

Then the plan was to go to Starbucks but instead we just sit at MacDonald.

Ate the new spicy Mcnuggets.

I LOVING IT!!.

The rest went home.

But haikal and i headed to library to do our RJ.

Stayed there till 8 plus.

Finish everything,went home.

My leg were dying when i reached home.

Eat,bathed and watch Korean dramas.

My leg is still in pain until today.

Wearing slippers because i am so lazy to use shoe.

Now i am super hungry!!

Update soon i thiink.

BY THE WAY!!!

I LOVE THE PICTURE OF ME AND SIMIN!!!

2010-07-20T15:18:00.001+08:00

This girl up here won the best dressed girl for E25A!!

She was shy but all of us knew that she was going to win.

Sexy girl for today.

Today problem was easy.

Did resume and interviewed other group.

Had fun taking photos.

Going to take more photos after class.

Now having 6th presentation.

Going to update thrice today!!

2010-07-20T09:24:00.002+08:00

Today my class had to wear formal.

I am glad that most of my class were very supportive about it.

Most of them are wearing so formal.

Facilitator are playing the most attired girl and boy.

It is so weird wearing heels and blazer in class.

We are just have to do Resume.

I did mine before so i just have to make it neat only.

Yesterday met Eddie!!

Happy time together.

I miss him now!):

Spent time together till 6 plus and headed home.

Did my Rj and off to sleep.

Woke up quite early today.

Got ready longer than usual.

Spent 45 minutes to get ready.

Went out and feel so awkward.

I love my class!!!!

They are so fun and hyper today!!

I will try to upload more pictures.

Most picture will be at Facebook!

2010-07-19T09:17:00.002+08:00

No!!

I did not went out again yesterday.

I wanted to go out to find my sister present.

But instead, i stayed at home i watch all four season of HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER?

It was not addictive at first.

But after watching it, i wanted to know what happened next.

So basically, i just rot at home like what every Sunday i did.

However, my Sunday is still AWESOME.

Mama was in good mood.

So no nagging for that day.

Had quality time with the siblings.

Everyone was home after 7pm.

Except for Dad.

He was working night shift.

Mama bullied me again.

She took my hair and tied it anyhow.

While my big sister kept on pinching me.

Now my hand is blue black.

I didn't ate much yesterday.

Just my 3 meals.

There were not crackers or ice-cream.

So i was save yesterday.

Save from eating non-stop.

Today facilitator is different.

We don't like her.

She was so lame.

Dislike!!!

I prefer my strict facilitator than her.

Monday blues!!!

Update later!~~

2010-07-18T10:22:00.009+08:00

Didn't be able to update after debating in class last friday.

Drama happened in class again.

After class,met Ismail and Aliya.

Deciding whether to go for the frisbee or not.

Didn't went for it.

Instead met Eddie and hand around with him again.

Went home quite late than usual.

Reached home around 7 plus and bathed.

Seriously,i can't recall what i did after that.

So just skip this part and go to MY AWESOME SATURDAY!!!

So yestesday,had NDP again.

My saturday is always AWESOME if i have the them^.

So yesterday show was more tiring.

Cause the "x" formation change last minute.

Had to go down the stairs and run at the back to the other side.

I was the marker,so had to run at the front.

It was fun in the end.

There were so much energy from the motivator.

But what is lacking is th energy from the primary 5 kids.

We had the arrogant school yesterday.

I seriously got no mood seeing their face.

Spoiled brat.

They place the black plastic bag full of stinky rubbish on our platform.

Audrey had to talked to the teacher.

The teacher is also freaking arrogant.

So what if your school is a prestigious school.

The student is freaking annoying.

They asked we to move away cause they can't see.

Who cares,we are just doing our job.

So we didn't move.

You are suppose to see at the screen stupid,not down there.

Dumb!

Forget the dumb kids kay.

So we ended early yesterday.

By 8.15 we are at the holding area.

By 9pm,we are dismissed.

Didn't went home with Eddie.

But i got the feeling that we took the same MRT.

I don't know.

Next Friday having RP2 game.

Probably i am going!!

Uploaded the picture yesterday cause i think i'm going out today.

Going to causeway point to find sister present.

Her birthday falls this Wednesday cum Racial Harmony day.

She got chongsam from mom.(:

No idea what to buy for her.

Update soon.

Ending with some firework picture i took yesterday.

2010-07-16T08:50:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, had my Communication UT.

I had no time to finish up the work.

I am certainly not confident with the results again.

After class,went Causeway point with Haikal and Hafsah.

I had so much fun.

Headed to Civic Centre first.

Deposit money and showed the noob Hafsah around.

Then destination is G2000.

Spent a lot of time there.

Chose different skirts and blouse.

End up choosing skirt and a purple blouse.

I look nice in it.

Next was Cotton On.

Bought the shades and went back to G2000.

Haikal is still there so fetch him and went to eat.

Ate at Pastamania.

A lot of laughter and i enjoyed it.

Distract my mind from the stupid guy in class.

Went home after taking Haikal spectacles.

Reached home and bathed.

Done with RJ and spent my time lying on bed.

Slacking.

Eddie didn't message.

Slept around 11 plus and woke up late today.

Lucky i was still early for class today.

Now having debating time in class.

Its about prosecution and defense.

I'm a jury today.

I like the topic but its hard to put it in PDT.

update later after i'm done debating.

2010-07-15T08:40:00.002+08:00

I have been taking at class.

So fun!!.

Yesterday was a great day.

Met him again.

After taking the ndp tickets,went home.

At the burger that daddy cooked for me.

Then eddie suddenly message me saying that he wants to meet me.

So went down for awhile and sit the usual place.

Gave him the ticket and went home.

At night watched Niyang Rapik.

I was scary cat as usual.

I was confident at first to watch it alone at my room.

But after the ghost appeared,i ran out the room and went to the living room.

My mom thought i was crazy shouting at night.-.-

They were laughing at me as usual.

I made my big sister wanting to watch the movie as well.

It was not crazy but the sound effect and picture just make me scared.

I am scared watching scary movie but it will still make me wanting to read it.

Slept after watching pretty little liars.

Now in class updating this blog while the class is talking about cells.

I am not a Biology student okay.

I know nothing about it.

Should pay attention now.

Update later~

2010-07-14T10:48:00.002+08:00

Today i start my day by sleeping in class.

I can't log in to my computer.

So i end up sitting in class like an dumb girl while waiting for my 1st study period.

Went to the It helpdesk with stella.

We were like going here and there.

They say,we have to go to this place then this place.

End up we were right at the first place.

Done with the changing of stuff.

Headed to the cafe alone and buy my food.

Hungry again now.

My group doing mathematic while i'm here blogging.

Hui yi is sitting next to me and reading what i'm writing now.

Not meeting Eddie today.

Thanks to the Ndp meeting.

I'm sure eating lunch!

Going to do my work first.

Update later on

2010-07-13T20:33:00.002+08:00

Today was Enterprise.

I was really excited today.

I don't know why.

Discuss with group and decided to do the poster version of presentation.

It was actually like mind map and summarize of the solution.

Had fun today.

Had Mathematic UT today.

People say it was easy but i felt that it was okay.

No comments for it.

Had a bet with Haikal.

Loser will have to treat waffle at Gelare.

Met with Eddie(the guy in the picture) this morning.

Was not planned but actually he was going the same way that i was walking to his workplace.

I was shocked cause he called me and asked me where i was.

I said i was in school but the fact is that i was still otw to school.

He was behind me(:

Met him for awhile and headed to school.

I was going to be late if i spent more time there.

Reached class by 8.25am.

I was not late.

Thanks godness.

Met with him again after UT.

Been meeting him twice this week.

I am a happy girl.

Maybe meeting him again tomorrow.

Not confirm yet.

I will not get bored meeting him(:

Done with RJ and everything else.

I feeling sleepy again.

Had been sleeping early now.

Nothing much to do.

No soccer and people to chat with late at night.

So mind as well sleep right.

I just realize,i had been updating this blog of mine regularly.

But it just seem nobody read it.

So should i just delete it?hmmm?

updates again tomorrow~~

2010-07-12T20:16:00.003+08:00

I finally get to meet EDDIE today!!

Yayness!!

He message me just now morning and i was so happy.

I was smiling from ear to ear.

Finish school around 3.30pm today.

Slacked at the smoking area with Haikal and Japtheth before meeting Eddie.

Joke around with them first and met eddie at the usual place around 5.15pm.

Spend quality time with him.

Misses him so much.

Head home around 6.40pm.

Met him like just now but now i starting to miss him again.

I'm done with RJ and i think i should head to sleep soon.

Slept for only four hours yesterday.

Thanks to big sister for conquering my bed.

I got a single bed but she still want to play laptop there.

She don't want use her queen bed because her bed is further from the switch.

While my bed is nearer so she sit there so that she can charge her laptop.

I would be going to sleep soon.

Toodles~~

2010-07-12T08:59:00.002+08:00

SPAIN WON!!

THEY GOT THEIR FIRST WORLD CUP AFTER ALL THE WAITING.

THEY ARE THE CHAMPION IN EUROPE AND NOW THE WORLD.!!

I slept from 9pm to 2.30am.

But it was not a nice sleep cause i had to share my single bed with my sister.

My sister was sitting at the front part and i am sleeping at the back part.

So try to imagine how i slept.

So i was woken up by the bright light and also from the noise of my sister playing laptop.

Woke up and switch on the tv.

It had not started yet so i switch on my lappy too.

The whole news feed kept being updated about the game.

There were so many yellow car and free kick given.

A total of 15 yellow card and 1 red card.

There were so many drama and i was so fed-up with it.

Slept around 5.30 because there were extra time given.

As the score was still 0-0 when the time ended.

Andres Iniesta scored for SPAIN.

Slept for only 2 hours.

Now in school.

I look like a zombie.

I'm tired and also sleepy.

They should make today public holiday.

I'm hungry but i deciding to eat less because i gaining weight again.

Eddie M.I.A.

It had been 3 days.

I guess his phone had been confiscated.

I'm stoning and keeping quite in class.

It is so not me.

I'm a talkative girl.

When i'm quite,ismail said that its either i'm tired or sick.

So now i guess i'm tired.

My group been change and now communication seem so difficult.

Everything that the facilitator saying is just not going in my brain.

The picture above is the length that i want to cut my hair.

Should i cut i more short or that length.?

I need help.Tag me okay

2010-07-11T11:02:00.003+08:00

Continue from yesterday.

The NDP NE show was so much fun.The Primary 5 kids were so hyper that they shouted and singing the national day songs.

I had so much fun making for them the balloons and all.

Made a lot of it and let the rest give it out.

We were able to see the finale which is the fireworks.

Usually we will be in the front saying goodbye to the president.

But for yesterday we get to stay at our platform and see the fireworks.

My platform was at the best spot.

We got to see the firework directly at our platform.

We sang along to the song and jump around like small kids.

After the finale,headed to the waiting area and change our clothes.

Headed home with ismail and aliya.

Went our separate ways at the mrt station.

I was alone in the mrt.

Freaking bored and listen music all the way.

Reach home so early yesterday.
Usual reach home around 11pm but yesterday were one hour earlier.

Seriously like no life and friend like that.

I really need to patch things up.

i think i should just talk to him and act like we are friends like usual.

The feeling wasn't suppose to develop at all.

Mama say she wants to go out today.

Yay!!finally can go out.

I'm so bored staying at home already.

World cup final is today!!!!

I am so watching it!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-07-10T23:43:00.001+08:00

SHOULD I CUT LIKE THIS AGAIN??

EDITED~~~~~~

Ndp today was so much fun!!!

It was tiring but at the same time fun.
We got the best crowd.

They were singing along to us and also cheering loudly.

Mostly,the Primary 5 today were AWESOME!!.

Many people were like having pms like that.

Getting mood swings and all.

I was not in a bad mood today cause i have all my happy people around.

RP2 is the BEST!!

We were so quite at first but now,everybody has bonded!!

So proud with ourselves.

I'm actually tired so i will just update this for the mean while.

I will confirm update again tomorrow!!

Btw,pls tag me whether i should cut my hair or not okay!!!

2010-07-09T13:27:00.003+08:00

Today is an up and down day.

I was hyper in the morning.

Then sad in the afternoon.

Now i am hyper again.

I'm being molested by my classmates.

My class today was very hyper today.

They shout,they laugh and they argue.

So many drama and laughter happens today.
Not forgetting Hacking to each other Facebook!!

I LOVE MY CLASS TODAY!

EDITED~~~~~~

So Science UT2 was a killer today.

It was so hard that i slept for 5 minutes before continuing the test.

Physics is the most tested topic.

Basically i suck at Physics so you should know how i did right.

I put some random number for some of my answers.

I know the first is wrong so i don't want to waste my time finding the rest of the question.

I was glad that the test was over.

Had no where to go.

But in the end followed Hafsah to causeway point to find her formal clothes for Communication module.

She tried on my blouse and pants.

She thought of buying the skirt but i said to her that the pants will look better on her because she can wear it again next time.

I plan to buy the blouse but i am not confirm yet.

Need to save money for it.

Still considering whether i should buy it or not.

The color was very nice but i had no money with me.

My saving is decreasing.

The amount is just not getting higher.

I am still not sure if i got the job or not.

I should start this coming Thursday.

But i am not sure yet.

Tomorrow having NDP.

But shikin not going.

She's bringing her mom to hospital.

Will be going dover alone.

Its not going to be fun because i got no friend to accompany me in bus.

Tomorrow having the NE show and i am so looking for it.

I will update more tomorrow i guess.

If i am not too tired.

Toodles~~

2010-07-08T13:56:00.002+08:00

Life been great i guess.

There's up and also down.

Many thing happen in my life.

Happy,sad,fear,anger!!

All sort of feelings.

Whats life without ups and down right.

Everything happen for a reason.

I'm just going positive and live life to the fullest.

Let bygones be bygones right.

People took me for granted.

But no,i will not drop and cry.

I'm going to stay strong and be myself.

Nothing going to pull be down.

Not even Stupid guys.

Life too short.

I'm not going to grief.

I'm going stand on my ground till the end.

2010-07-08T10:21:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was the Enterprise UT2.Guess what!I think i am going to flunk it because it was freaking difficult.I wasted my time by just browsing my notes to find the correct error or power.As they have so many theory,i was not been able to memorize everything into my brain.Yesterday was a stressful day.Know why??Because yesterday i was having my mathematic module.It was okay actually except that my brain can't think yesterday.

Had my UT2.It was raining and i can't concentrate as it was so freaking cold.I was wearing long sleeves but i can still feel the coldness.End school by 5 and met Eddie at the overhead bridge.It wa nice to see him after a few weeks not seeing him.Miss him a lot.

Slack at our usual place till the rain stop.By 6,headed home.Papa cooked burger for me.He just know that i was so hungry.Slept around 9 yesterday cause i waking up at 2.30am to watch World Cup.Luckily i was able to wake up.Heard a lot of noise from brother room.Went to see what's going on and saw he and his friend watching soccer in the room.I was so PS.I was half awake.

Quickly exit from his room and went to watch soccer at the living room alone.Papa wanted to watch too but he didn't wake up.Spain won!!I am so freaking happy.i was shouting and cheering alone.So boring right.Facebook was the one accompanying me.I got 3 hour of sleep after the match.Glad that i was able wake up.Got ready for school and left house at 8.10am.

We are learning Biology today and i got no clue what we are doing today.The topic is Cell.Luckily Asha is in my group.She got A2 for it.So thankful for that.New drama in class.Many things happen and know nothing.So followed the society for smoke break and listen to their story.I knew that it was coming.Sooner or later,people will start hating the person.

Update more later.

2010-07-06T20:45:00.002+08:00

I shouldn't blog today because i'm having my Understanding test tomorrow.But i can't wait to blog about watching Eclipse today.I know i'm slow but what the heck.I still enjoy my day.Haikal's treat.My belated belated belated birthday!!.

It was freaking good as i expected.The book was super good and luckily for the movie itself was great.I don't care if some of you think the movie is lame or what ever s***.To me,it is the best.I'm totally team Edward.I am so annoyed with Jacob.He is so irritating and attention seeker.i don't care you want to say Jacob is hot and Edward is not.Because i don't watch movie base on the actor but their role in it.For looks it will b Jacob of course but the role it will be Edward.So, i'm neutral.

I've not start my revision on Enterprise and i think i should start on it because there is so many theories that i need to store in my brain.My brain going to hurt so much today.By tomorrow,im going to let it all when i'm doing the UT.

I should get going now.Cherios!

2010-07-05T09:26:00.002+08:00

Gosh!!!

I'm having Monday Blues!!!.

I seriously have no mood today.Since when did i have mood for school.I'm fasting today and i almost ate a sweet just now.Luckily i was fast enough to remember that i was fasting.I'm tired from waking early today.Woke up at 4.30 am and slept back after morning prayer.Thats like around 6am i got to sleep.Woke up at 7.15am and feeling super tired.

Slept late yesterday.Thats the reason why i'm feeling super tired today.Reach school early like usual and sit there day dreaming.I'm talking much today.Stupid Happy pill change into Annoying pill.I hate him okay!!My day is not getting any better.Having understanding test 2 today.I am so not ready for it.I did not study at all.I only have notes from my friends.I'm just going to use it for the test today.I don't want to get a bad grade again.I want a B or A please.

I'm probably not going to update at night.I got nothing to write for today.Super slack today and nothing exciting happening in my life-.-

I just hit Wan Him for no reason.I am so sorry WAN HIM!!..

I'm going off now..Toodles~~

2010-07-04T16:44:00.002+08:00

Picture perfect!!

They are the one who always make my Saturday a wonderful day!!

Without one of them,my day will be a bad one and i will be sulking the whole day!!

I LOVE U ALL!!!

Especially NOOR ASHIKIN!!!..

My Saturday was spent splendidly.Met shikin first around 10.30 at Choa Chu Kang MRT station.Before heading our way to Dover.It was raining and i was shivering.Boarded the bus and make our way to Padang!!It wasn't raining at first but when we are going for the rehearsal,it start to rehearsal.The show still continues even though it was raining.Motivated under the rain.Was lucky i was wearing my cap.(:

The crowd was boring!!No excitement.The friends was the one who excite me instead.The show went well.Ended by 8.30.Debrief and change all,it was already 9.15pm.Headed to the Mrt station with Shikin.Took the green line and reached home before 11pm.Bathed and watched World Cup.Slept around 1 am.

Woke up late today.Woke up at 10am and did the house chores.Here i am now.Rotting at home.I hate Sunday.I have no life now.Saturday have ndp and sunday stays at home.I'm trying to forget about him.Not worth my time.Friends are wonderful.Never fail to cheer up.Especially SHIKING AND HAFSAH.HAFSAH is my new best friend now.I share everything with her.But nobody can replace Shikin.LOVE HER!

Sometimes i talked to her like i am talking with my boyfriend.But that is just how i talk to her.Don''t think anything when i talk her like couple or hugging her okay.I'm still straight even though guys just love to hurt my feelings.I treat her like my best friend and like an older sister.She's always there when i need her and thats why i heart her so much.There's nothing that will make us mad with each other.

Thank you so much friends for making my life a wonderful life!!Appreciate it a lot!!<3<3

2010-07-02T20:30:00.002+08:00

The plans to do science assignment did not happen

Republic polytechnic connection was down due to UT i guess. So khairul, khairul friends and i headed to Causeway point to eat.It was a normal outing.When going off,saw izzati sister.I didn't saw her.But when i turn one more time,there she was sitting down.Said hi to her.Misses her so much.Primary school friend's please make an outing!!

Today nothing much happen.Did great for presentation.Listen to what the facilitator commented last week.The result to it,my group kill it.We were motivated and presented with all our heart.

Tomorrow having the NE show for the primary 5 student.So excited for tomorrow.It's going to be the first show and i'm nervous.Can' t wait to meet shikin but not someone else.We are drifting away.So theres no point thinking about it anymore.

Yay for tomorrow!! :D

2010-07-02T08:30:00.003+08:00

Sorry for not updating for the past 2 days.Been very busy lately.

Last Wednesday, was nothing special. Went for the science workshop with shikin and dayah.<3

Ended early.Head home and fought my big sister.Dramatic night.

Thursday,come to school with my puffy and swollen eyes due to crying.Had no mood in the morning but in the afternoon,my classmate were so hyper.Celebrated belated and advanced birthday for HAFSAH,JANANI and SYUHADA!!

It was so much fun.Yayoi made my laptop eat the cake as well.Chase her and tried to kill her.(jkjk of course).Presented at the Lecture room.Super awkward.My classmates use the microphone to present.But not me.I don't need to use it because my voice is like much more louder than the microphone.Like what people say,i accidentally swallowed a microphone when i was small.

After school went town with shikin and dayah.AWESOME day!!!Watch Knight and day at cathay Cineleisure.Rating for the show will be 10/10.It was super funny and good show.You all should watch it.Special thank you for sheila(shikin friend) for booking the tickets and also for the free food.Appreciate it a lot.After all the tiring laughing headed home with shikin.In summary,it was a blast going out with them.

Today nothing much.Just meeting khairul to finish up the science assignment.Will update again at night i think.Toodles~

2010-06-29T08:53:00.002+08:00

Slept early yesterday.By 11 pm i was exhausted and super sleepy.Hit the sheet and was woken up at 7 am by sister.Rush to pray and played lappy for a while before bath.Left house by 8am and still reach very early for class.Change group today and i am happy to have Nazihah in the group.Super hyper today.Made so much noise with her.Going for my 9.30am break in a while.Super hungry.Like always.I am sure that i am not eating Lunch today.Talk to you later!!

2010-06-28T19:13:00.002+08:00

I am back!!So after what i did earlier,went for my break and lunch.Ate a lot today in school.Tomorrow i will cut down.Hope so.Been saying that for the whole week but i did not cut down.Blame it on pms.So today problem was okay.My group got good comment from the faci.Happy to hear that.By 3.30 finish up my RJ and headed to shikin class which is the same level as Aizad.Unintentionally bump into Aizad.Made my day again.You know,i know okay Shikin.Waited for shikin friend and we headed our way to LR-E4.Had briefing about the beijing trip.Probably not going.The criteria is very troublesome and my interest to go just faded.Finish by 5 and went home.Saw him again.

Shikin i really need your help :)

Reach home,had my bath and eat dinner.Ate a lot again.Cannot blame me cause mama just have to cook good food today.Mama cook my favourite chicken wing.Two THUMBS UPP!!!Now i got nothing to do.Played game and watch movie.Now waiting for somebody to reach home. :D

For that i end it here.

2010-06-28T08:57:00.002+08:00

I'm in school now and damn bored.They have not even start on the problem statement yet.Going through the UT answer and i don't like it.Today morning went well.Work up by myself because mama gone work early.Could not open my eyes but just force it.Having briefing on the Beijing trip today with SHIKIN!!Hope we can get the same room.Yay!!!

Update more later!!!

2010-06-27T16:13:00.002+08:00

This does not happen a lot.It is so random for me to update twice in a day but what can i say,i am super the duper bored to the max.Staying home today and it is not cool.I got no life already.School then training then staying home.Gosh!!I want my life back.Oh ya!!i got the job..Yay!!will be staring 2nd week of July i think.

I don't know what i should do..Should i continue or just wait and see how the situation is..Did i make the wrong decision.??Please tell me something.I need confirmation from you soon.Don't left me hanging like this please. ): I quess we just have to wait and see.I will not make the first move anymore.Thats a promise i make to myself!

2010-06-27T10:24:00.003+08:00

Saturday will always be a hectic and tiring day until 9 August.Had National Day Parade Rehearsal again.Next will be the National Education Show and there will be primary 5 student that we have to motivate.Looking forward to it.So yesterday training was okay a lot of shouting and laughter.I love my group.There always make up weird chant.The weather was freaking sunny.Had minor headache from the sun and drank three bottle of water.I think more.I got sleeves line again.I thought i will not have it cause i didn't suntan when we went Sentosa the other time but i was wrong.Mr sun please dont shine so much next week okay.Please pity us ((:

So shikin went back early.She was sick.That means i was left alone again.Went home with Aizad and his friend Erman.I got no friend left as they were all gone when i reach so i just went back with Aizad.Took the green line with them then change at Jurong East.reach home around 10 plus and straight away headed to the toilet.Had my refreshing bath and went online.Some shit happen in Aizad group and he was the middle man.Please don't quit the NDP because of your selfish team mate okay.Work it out first.

Slept around 1 .30 am and was woken up by the noisy elder sister and mama.Fought with sister then do the house chores.Help mama cooked breakfast and now playing lappy to release my stress from her!!.Will be staying home today and watch the England vs Germany game (:

I would like to make a shoutout to HAFSAH BINTE MOHAMED NASIR!!!

YOU TURN 18TH TODAY!!!HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.!!THANK YOU FOR LISTENING TO MY STORY AND PROBLEM!!THANK YOU ALSO FOR THE ADVICES ON WHOM SHOULD I CHOOSE.THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE WHEN I NEED A LISTENING EAR AND SORRY FOR THE SCREAMS THAT I MADE IN CLASS!!I LOVE YOU!!HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY MY DARLING!!YOU ARE A GOOD FRIEND YOU KNOW!!I'N NOT TOO LATE TO REALIZE THAT!!THANK GOODNESS!! <3<3<3

2010-06-25T20:51:00.002+08:00

Before i start, there is nothing between me and Aizad so do need to think much!!We are just friend now.

Basically on Wednesday, i attend the science Molecules workshop together with my classmate.There were me, hafsah, janani, hui yi, farah, yi ling, michelle, si min and qiao chen. It was so much fun. Instead of listening to the faci , i was webcamming with Aizad. It was boring and i could not concentrate on what he is talking. We were done quite early as the faci let us off early. So after that, went and meet Aizad and was introduced with his friends. They were fun people to be with. Not the mat2 type. I like it. Yeah!! So after for the waiting we went causeway point to have dinner. It was supposed to be me and Aizad but two of his friends tag along.So we talked about 2 hours there. A lot of topic was open up like soccer , wrestling and power ranger. I enjoyed it because i myself know what they are talking about and enjoyed it. So we were all supporting different team. So there was so gerekness happen. Around 9.30 headed home to catch the England match.

Now Thursday , school was okay. I was very cranky on that day because of some stupid people in class. So as soon as class ends, went to Aizad class and do my RJ there. After that we went to have our late lunch and joke around. Around 6 headed home while he go for his rapsody IG. Joke around with my sisters and thought that the donut my sister bought were a dead hamster. I thought my sister hamster died then they put it in the box but it was actually. I dont even know why i thought that at first. Maybe it is just random for my older sister to buy food and left it for me.

So today Friday, my day was much better. Today problem was fun only that i got confused when my classmate where talking about different thing. My group did their best and we got mix up during our presentation. Justyn(my faci) called us out as he wants to say something to us. He asked us what happen and we just tell him what happen. I agrees with him about we go school to make mistake and learn from it. We really realize our mistake. Syuhada cried as she put the blame on her. it is not her fault. It is our fault together. So dont be sad okay. :)

After school meet Aizad again, accompany him for lunch then headed to Library. Spend my time with hime by watching funny videos and tickling him.I pinch his hand and what i got is just skin. While when i pinch mine theres meat. It's not fair!!. He has high metabolism. Laugh and laugh a lot today. Around 8 headed home and he fetched me home. Because he say it late. So yeah, here i am blogging after having my bath and dinner.Will be watching Brazil vs Portugal today.yay!! Aizad favourite team!!-.-

I am so excited for tomorrow. Meeting shikin and aizad for ndp training!!!! Padang here i come!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-06-23T22:56:00.002+08:00

I thought that being single is easy but it is now.I have to make decision and thats not cool!!

I think i should just concentrate on my studies first and treat both of them as my close friend!.Not being arrogant but this like this happens when you single or even when you are attached..For now, i think i should act normal and don't think about it too much

Basically school was okay today.Went for the science workshop and spend my time webcam-ing

with Ahmad Aizad.After workshop went meet him at the library and wait for his friend to come.So today i made 4 friends.They fun to be with.I can talk to about many things.Soccer,Wrestling and even power rangers.I know such a kid but i miss being a kid!!

Had dinner at Mac at talk for 2 hours there.Now at home watching WORLD CUP!!ENGLAND VS SLOVENIA!!I know england cannot win i think but i still support them because i have been supporting them since 2002.It have been so long so i decide to stay on to them.

I really got nothing to blog so i will just end it here.Im happy being single.I can make so many friends without anyone controlling me!!!! :)

2010-06-17T14:22:00.002+08:00

I am so exhausted with school now.Its like really stressing to see different kind of problems every single day.people comments on the end of the presentation is not helping at all.It made me more confused and now my knowledge is being shuffle up.It sucks when that happen.After the whole day of trying to understand the thing,they are there to jumble it up.How great right.I hate some of them.Can they just shut their mouth and stop talking.

I HATE YOU THE MOST!!!

My school and my single life is going on smoothly.I feel more light-weighted now after the break up.I don't see the point the need to be depressed for a relationship that does not show my future in it.Its like i am not 100% sure that all my sacrifices is worth it.Friends are great.I have my happy pills that will entertain me when i am down.Even though they are annoying at times,they actually can made my day.Exception for my darlings.I love them and i wouldn't feel annoyed by them.(:

Dayah and me went job hunting on Wednesday.We went to 313 and entered a shop.I was grateful that the shop have vacancy.After filling up the documents that is needed,the supervisor interviewed us.I was confident and answered the question easily.I just hope that i will get the job.Need a job badly.

He just made my day!!

I am amazed that after all this while,you were always there when i needed you the most.

U waited for me like more than 7 years.

I am just not ready to be in a relationship so i just gonna make the "he" a mystery

2010-06-13T11:40:00.002+08:00

I am single for 2 months now. I finally feel that i am really certain that i am over him already.

It was not because i found a new guy or played timer but i think it was the personality clashed.

After this 3 years,then i finally realized that my personality and his does not goes well.

It may be from the module that i am studying now made me realized about the clashed.

I know all of you will have the same thinking like "why did i end it up after 3 years together"?

Its not the duration that counts but the amount of fights that we have.

I know fights will always occurs when we are in a relationship but if there is more fights than happiness, would you do the same thing as i did.

I know you would.

I am glad that i can move forward and stop looking back.

My darlings was the one who had helped me when this situation happen.

I do not know them long,why infact i only know 2 of them 2 months and the other one for 1 year.

They are Sihua,Jin Mei and Shikin.

They were with me when i was down and when i was happy.

Its hard to find a trusted friend nowadays.

Especially what i had gone through during my secondary school life.

I was fortunate that it is different now.

In conclusion, i am satisfied with what i have even though i have to be single as i know being single is not a bad thing at all.Because now i have more time for my friends and family.

Not forgetting SCHOOL!!!!